Does My Dog Understand Yoruba?

It’s 6 a.m. on a Saturday. You’re barely awake, and your dog is bouncing around like they’ve had ten shots of espresso. You look at them and mutter, “Ahn ahn, kilon se eleyi?” (“What’s doing this one?”) They pause, tilting their head like they’re either confused or mildly insulted. And in that moment, you wonder… does my dog understand Yoruba?

Apparently, some, like TwenryTheDog, do.

Welcome to the world of Nigerian dog parenting, where every woof is a conversation and every stare might be a subtle form of sass. 

If you’ve ever wondered if your furry friend understands Yoruba or debated what local foods are safe for them, this one’s for you.

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1. “Do You Even Like Me?”

As Nigerian dog parents, we don’t do lukewarm love. You’re either obsessed with your dog or mildly resentful that they don’t understand what “Iya mi” means (because naturally, they should). Every time they choose to ignore you in public or avoid a cuddle, we can’t help but wonder “Do you even like me?”.

Forget that they’re animals with independent minds and zero social obligations – the real question is, why aren’t they glued to your side at all times?

2. “Are You Possessed or Just Playing?”

Dog parents, raise your hand if you’ve ever watched your dog sprint through the house at random hours, and wondered if maybe, just maybe, they’re “seeing something.” They bark at shadows, fixate on random objects, and sometimes look at an empty corner as if they’re listening to family secrets from your ancestors.

But if you’re a Nigerian parent, you know there’s only one reasonable explanation: village people. Of course, it couldn’t just be that the dog is bored. No – they’re either in deep spiritual warfare or protecting the household from invisible enemies. We don’t know which it is, but just in case, we mutter a quick prayer as we pass by them.

3. “Do You Actually Enjoy Eating the Same Food Every Day?”

We grew up on jollof rice, egusi soup, small chops, and a hundred other spicy delights, so the concept of dry kibble every day just doesn’t add up. And if you’re being honest, sometimes your dog looks at you with that “Is this it?” expression every time you scoop kibble into their bowl.

There’s also the guilt: What if they want some suya? What if they’re craving fufu and you’ve been giving them dry biscuits like a heartless human? It’s gotten so bad that you find yourself apologizing to your dog as you pour kibble. “Sorry o, today no suya for you. We go try next time.”

4. “What Name Would My Mother Call You?”

Every Nigerian dog has at least two names. There’s the official name – Bruno, Bella, Max – and then there’s the name Mummy calls them when she’s done with their nonsense. Dogs have no choice but to receive their Nigerian parents’ wrath when they misbehave: “Ah, Kolade Dogginton! You are looking for trouble today!”

And the Yoruba version? It comes out every time your dog does something borderline reckless. If they tear up a shoe, for example, their new name is “Oloshi Bruno.” That’s when you know you’ve entered “stop embarrassing me” territory.

5. “How Do You Know Which Visitors to Ignore?”

Let’s face it: Nigerian dogs know how to mind their business. Your dog will ignore some guests but will turn into Best In Greeting whenever your best friend shows up with treats. And if a stranger comes with bones or leftover chow? Forget about it. This dog will transform from indifferent to the friendliest pup in the world in a second.

It’s become so consistent that you’ve started watching their reactions to people to know if someone’s vibe is right or wrong. Your dog ignores a guest? “Hmm, se kosi nkan mii.” (“There’s something off here.”) As dog parents, you trust the dog’s intuition more than the guest’s smile.

6. “Do You Know What I’m Saying, or Are You Just Here for the Vibes?”

This is the ultimate question. Nigerian parents are known for their monologues, and dog parents are no exception. You’ve probably had more conversations with your dog than you’d like to admit. There’s a lot of “Look at what you’ve done!” and “I hope you’re happy now” – and somehow, you convince yourself that they’re understanding all of it.

And when they look at you with that blank stare? Well, maybe they’re just tired of your constant commentary on their life choices. After all, your dog probably just wants to sleep and eat – why do you have to bring your rants into this?

So, does your dog actually understand Yoruba? Most likely, no. But does that stop you from speaking to them like they do? Never. Because deep down, every Nigerian dog parent knows that the real bond isn’t in the understanding – it’s in the shared experiences, the looks, and the endless, often one-sided conversations.

At the end of the day, whether they understand us or not, they’re still part of the family – even if they’re convinced we’re crazy for talking so much. After all, what’s a Nigerian home without someone muttering Yoruba threats at an innocent pet?

Are you a dog parent or do you plan on being one soon? Join the Naija Pawrents community on Fusion for more banter, tips, and tricks.