Holiday Romance or December Fling? How to Tell the Difference.

The streets are lit, Detty December playlists are blasting, and IJGBs (I Just Got Back crew) are swarming the clubs like never before. Love (or something that looks like it) is in the air.

But how do you know if your December boo is here for a real holiday romance or just another December fling to tick off their “Detty Nigeria” bucket list?

Don’t worry, we’ve got you. Here’s a guide for separating the lovers from the players.

1. They Hit You with the “I Came to Nigeria Because of You” Line

If someone looks you in the eyes, smiles, and says, “I didn’t plan to come home this year, but I just had to see you,” they’re lying. Like, “I promise I’ll text you when I land” lying.

IJGBs have been planning their December trips since Easter. They came home for the amala, the street parties, and the wedding crash opportunities – not you. Take that line with a pinch of salt and manage your expectations.

2. They Only Want to Meet at Night

If your boo’s idea of “quality time” involves only nighttime activities—clubs, concerts, or “Netflix and chill”—you’re likely starring in their December fling highlight reel.

A true holiday romance will include a romantic stroll during the day or, at the very least, brunch at that Instagrammable café. If the sun never shines on your dates, know your place: night shift.

3. They Refuse to Introduce You to Their Family

An IJGB who’s serious about you will proudly show you off to their family and friends. If you’ve never heard the words “Meet my mum” or “My cousins are having a party, let’s go”, you’re not a holiday romance—you’re a December fling.

Don’t be fooled if they claim their family is “too traditional” or “doesn’t like visitors.” Meanwhile, the only visitors their family doesn’t like are random December “prospects” like you.

4. Their Instagram Stories Say It All

Social media will always expose them. If their Insta story is full of flashy cars, popping bottles at Cubana, and random group selfies with “vibes on vibes” captions, run.

A holiday romance partner will proudly post your cute selfie with the caption, “My Lagos sunshine 🌞.” But if all you see is them shouting “Who deyyyyy!” at every party, you’re just another chapter in their December diary.

5. They’re Suddenly “Busy” After January 2nd

January 2nd is the ultimate test. If they start ghosting you, making vague excuses like “I have to sort out my visa renewal” or “I’ll call you when I settle down back in the UK”, congratulations, sis — you’ve officially been Detty December-ed.

Real holiday romance partners will already be talking about how to keep things alive long-distance. If you hear nothing but “safe travels, dear”, don’t bother texting them in February; their true love is the British weather.

6. They Never Talk About Future Plans

A December fling is all about living in the moment. They’ll say things like, “Let’s just enjoy what we have now” or “Why complicate things?”

On the other hand, a holiday romance will have them saying, “So, when are you coming to visit me in Canada?” or “I think we should make this official.” If there’s no mention of 2025, you’re just part of their December fun.

December in Nigeria is a playground, and the IJGBs are the gamemasters. While there’s nothing wrong with a little holiday fling (we love a good Detty December story), don’t let the sweet nothings and imported accents sweep you off your feet.

So, if you find yourself falling for an IJGB this season, keep your heart guarded, and your eyes open. And above all, have fun! It’s Detty December, after all!

Nesiama Fasola

Nesiama (Ness) Fasola is a community manager, tech enthusiast, writer and full time hopeless romantic. She loves to scribble words in a bid to make sense of the jumble of thoughts, ideas and emotions that constantly plague her mind. At her leisure, you can either find her nose-deep in a book, brewing coffee or poking around in her garden.